So this yesterday, I participated in #pitmad, the twitter pitch party in which unagented authors (like myself) can pitch their unpublished novel. Agents then can shuffle through all the pitches and heart the ones they want to see more from – sounds great, right?
That’s what I thought, too.
I submitted two pitches for two different novels at two different times of the day. Guess how many agents gave my pitches a heart? If you guess a whopping ZERO, you’d be right.
Yup, I didn’t get a single agent’s attention. Then, I went to investigate the pitches that did get attention, and they were the dumbest pitches I’ve ever heard – example: “This book + this book = my book.” And that was it. That type of tweet got more attention.
So I spent from about 7 last night to noon this morning in a 100% depression stupor. I laid in bed and didn’t move. I didn’t want to move. I had no desire to get up and do anything.
Is all this time and energy that I’m pouring into these projects going to waste? Does it even matter? Am I wasting my time revising and revising? Should I just burn my manuscripts and go find a mind-numbing job like everyone else?
I’m not as depressed now as I was last night, but I don’t feel good by any means. I’ve spent years working to improve my writing, working on these novels, only to be turned away at every single opportunity. And then I see the garbage that is getting publishing instead, and I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong.
I don’t feel like opening a project today, or for a while at least. It’s… disheartening to see how many times I’ve been rejected, and then see what’s being accepted instead.
Anyone else feeling me out there? Anyone else find #pitmad to be an absolute waste of time?